


the twitter au no one asked for

by orphan_account



Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, Naruto
Genre: Boruto Is A Little Shit, Domestic Fluff, Family, Family Bonding, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Internet Famous, Memes, No Slash, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Platonic Relationships, Social Media, Thirst Tweets, Twitter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-27
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-23 05:14:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20002879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: In which Boruto and his family show the people of twitter that they all collectively have one (1) braincell.Absolutely no slash, all relationships are domestic/platonic





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> IMPORTANT PLEASE READ*****
> 
> Boruto and the entire next gen are 17/18 in this fic! Also, If you're wondering, this is NOT a Modern AU haha, they're still in their world of shinobi, Naruto is the Hokage, and everything that's canon in Boruto is canon in this fic. I just thought it'd be fun to put them on twitter! I also really like the idea of Boruto being kinda famous/well-known so yeah he pretty much has his own fanbase and it disgusts his friends lmao anyways

_July 26th 8:22 pm_

**boruto stans interact** _@_ __uwusarah_

if only **_@_** ** _boruhoe_** knew what i'd let him do to me hnnjhgghhh,

_8:29 pm_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 ** _@boruhoe_** this is the 9th thirst tweet for you that i'm seeing today and i don't think i can take it anymore

_8:29 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@saradaa_ **is that jealousy i smell? also **_@_ _ _uwusarah_ **i'd be more than happy to find out if you know what i mean-

_8:29 pm_

**boruto stans interact** _@_uwusarah_

holy shit! he replied! HE REPLIED HJMSKAKDJFN a god replied to my tweet

_8:30 pm_

**Kagami** _@ka.gam1_

wow he can top me any day. any. day.

_8:30 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@ka.gam1**_ does tomorrow work for you? ;)

_8:30 pm_

**Kagami** _@ka.gam1_

 _ **@boruhoe** _i-

_8:31 pm_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@_ _saradaa_

 _ **@boruhoe** _literally don't encourage this????

_8:33 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@_ _boruhoe_

 _ **@saradaa** _let me have my fun

_8:34 pm_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

 _ **@boruhoe** _Boruto, you're banned from twitter oh my god

_8:34 pm_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

AAHHAH ITS WHAT HE DESERVES

_8:35 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@_ _boruhoe_

why is the hokage even on twitter ew what the fuck

_8:35 pm_

**Sarada Uchiha** @ _saradaa_

 _ **@boruhoe** _He's literally your dad

_8:36 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@_ _boruhoe_

 _ **@saradaa** _okay why is my dad on twitter ew what the fuck

_8:36 pm_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@_ _narutouzumaki_

 ** _@boruhoe_ **Language

_8:37 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@_ _boruhoe_

 ** _@narutouzumaki_** fuck okay

_8:56 pm_

**boruto stans interact** _@_uwusarah_

this really just happened huh perhaps i cant breathe-

_July 29th 8:43 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

if i jump off a building, PLEASE don't call my aunt sakura, she'd heal me and then i'd fucking survive :((((

_8:44 am_

**chlamydia tingz** _@leslioop_

a mood

_8:44 am_

**spam acc** _@caermit_

rt

_8:45 am_

**Ella** _@ellalala__

RTTTTT

_8:45 am_

**want 2 shikaDIE** _@shikashikadai_

me every day

_8:45 am_

**sherri** _@sherrianderson1624_

oh look, boruto is one of us

_8:46 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

damn it isn't boruto supposed to be banned from twitter

_8:46 am_

**Sasuke** _@sasukeuchiha_

 ** _@boruhoe_** I don't know what's going on with you but this sounds serious. Should I call Naruto?

_8:48 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@sasukeuchiha** _don't bother. this is all his fault anyways i don't want to hear from that man

_8:49 am_

**Fuck i dropped my mental stability** _@cccarolx.00_

 ** _@boruhoe_** bby what's wrong :(

_8:52 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@cccarolx.00_** life isn't fair, that's what

_July 29th 11:09 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

I ate the rest of the Cheerios this morning and now my son won't talk to me and I don't know where he is

_11:10 am_

**Sasuke** _@sasukeuchiha_

Oh is this what he was going off about earlier?

_11:11 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

 ** _@sasukeuchiha_** What? What was he saying?

_11:12 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 _ **@narutouzumaki** _your son is a dramatic bitch and it truly amazes me. all this over some cheerios-

_11:13 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@saradaa**_ laugh it up. i'm at your house and your mom let me have the rest of YOUR cheerios

_11:13 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

 _ **@boruhoe**_ Come home now

_11:14 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 _ **@boruhoe**_ i really hope you're joking but knowing you,,, youre probably not

_11:15 am_

**Sasuke** _@sasukeuchiha_

 _ **@boruhoe** **@sakurauchiha** _Is he really at our house?

_11:16 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

 _ **@sasukeuchiha** _To be fair, he asked nicely...

_11:16 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@_ _boruhoe_

 ** _@sakurauchiha_** love you aunt sakura!!!! we stan an aunt who doesn't neglect children!!!

_11:16 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

 _ **@boruhoe**_ Aw kid you're so sweet! I love you too! But you're right next to me, so I don't know why we're tweeting these things :>

_11:17 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

 _ **@boruhoe**_ Stop implying that I neglect you! I'll go grocery shopping with your mom I promise just stop being dramatic and come home

_11:18 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 _ **@sakurauchiha**_ mom you should've let him starve

_11:18 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@saradaa_ **choke. your mom loves me!!! 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mitsuki gets twitter, Boruto gets scarred for life, and some cute Aunt Sakura moments because I just realized how much I want Boruto & Sakura interactions in the anime! Yay!

_July 29th 2:06 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

i have successfully convinced mitsuki to make a twitter i fuckin WIN at life

_2:09 pm_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

you take that back you did noT just drag him into this unholy app

_2:09 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@saradaa**_ phew it is cold in this chili's tonight

_2:09 pm_

**want 2 shikaDIE** _@shikashikadai_

drop mitsuki's @ you whore

_2:09 pm_

**god's masterpiece** _@chochoke_

you're going to corrupt mitsuki i swear

_2:10 pm_

**Mitsuki** _@mitsuki_

 ** _@chochoke @saradaa @shikashikadai_** Hi! Boruto is teaching me how to use Twitter! I followed you guys

_2:11 pm_

**god's masterpiece** _@chochoke_

 ** _@mitsuki_** please say sike

_2:13 pm_

**Mitsuki** _@mitsuki_

 ** _@chochoke_** Sike? Lmao did I do that correctly?

_2:13 pm_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

boruto what the fuck have you done

_2:15 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@saradaa_** god's work.

_2:17 pm_

**best boy** _@inojiny_

 ** _@mitsuki_** Welcome to twitter

_2:18 pm_

**Mitsuki** _@mitsuki_

 ** _@inojiny_** Thanks!（＾ ｖ ＾） 

_2:20 pm_

**god's masterpiece** _@chochoke_

 ** _@mitsuki_** you're too good for this app leaVE while you still can

_July 29th 4:46 pm_

**Darcy** _@sxftstan__

imagine the shit the 7th hokage could do with his shadow clone jutsu man he's literally a work of art but just imagine getting it from like 4 of him

_4:48 pm_

**vroom vroom** _@n0tnatasha_

hinata uzumaki doesnt have to imagine-

_4:56 pm_

**Iki** _@c3oreod_

must've been some good sex if they ended up having TWO kids

_4:58 pm_

**want 2 shikaDIE** _@shikashikadai_

 ** _@boruhoe_** i had to see this,,, so now you have to too

_4:59 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@shikashikadai**_ just when i thought i had seen it all,,, tHANKS I HATE IT I HATE IT

_5:03 pm_

**Darcy** _@sxftstan__

 ** _@boruhoe_** omg you're here we were just talking about your parents

_5:03 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@sxftstan__** i have to gouge my eyes out tweets like that should be bANNED

_5:04 pm_

**Darcy** _@sxftstan__

 ** _@boruhoe_** waitasecond yOU KNOW THE SHADOW CLONE JUTSU TOO RIGHT OH MY n mkncSFCGJ

_5:05 pm_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@sxftstan__** i am going to leave now eye-

_July 30th 3:22 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

what if we... committed tax fraud together??? haaahhHAhsa,,, just kidding lol that would be weird...

_3:22 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

.......unless..,????

_3:23 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

Hey kid?

_3:23 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@sakurauchiha_** hey aunt sakura! 

_3:24 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

 ** _@boruhoe_** Please go to sleep!

_3:25 am_

_**i'm really boruto** @boruhoe_

**_@sakurauchiha_** okay okay i'll sleep as soon as i finish this mental breakdown

_3:26 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

 ** _@boruhoe_** Hmm sometimes I question your mental health. I gotta head back to the hospital in a few minutes, promise me you'll sleep soon? :)

_3:27 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@sakurauchiha_** of course aunt sakura-

_3:27 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

 ** _@boruhoe_** Yay!

_July 30th 6:37 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

i lied

_6:37 am_

**Sakura Uchiha** _@sakurauchiha_

You said you were going to sleep!

_6:37 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@sakurauchiha_** suddenly i am Asleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @boruhoe - Boruto  
> @saradaa - Sarada  
> @narutouzumaki - Naruto  
> @sasukeuchiha - Sasuke  
> @shikashikadai - Shikadai  
> @sakurauchiha - Sakura  
> @chochoke - Chocho  
> @mitsuki - MItsuki  
> @inojiny - Inojin


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did NOT proofread this so there may be typos but its a twitter au so no one actually cares lmao

_August 1st 12:01 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

it's my sister's birthday wish her a happy fucking birthday or choke!! thank u!

_1:02 am_

**karen** _@kahren.vvv_

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HIMAWARI UZUMAKIIIIIIII

_1:02 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

the uzumaki family's best child is finally turning 15

_1:02 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@** **saradaa** _i'd like to be offended but you're not wrong

_1:03 am_

**Mitsuki** _@mitsuki_

Please tell Himawari that I wish her a happy birthday! :)

_1:03 am_

**want 2 shikaDIE** _@shikashikadai_

that girl is fucking scary when she's mad but happy birthday hima!!!

_1:04 am_

**lord 7th sit on me** _@mrcleannnnnn_

Best girl's birthday today oh my god!!!

_1:05 am_

**Darcy** _@sxftstan__

HOLY SHE'S ALREADY 15 WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE?!?!?!

_1:05 am_

**bruh momentum** _@jared19.nflhtr_

happy birthday himawari uzumaki!!!!!!!!!!

_1:05 am_

**Broke Bitch Hours** _@sadshinobifromsand_

himawari uzumaki is the purest, most precious person on this earth tell me im wrong

_1:05 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@sadshinobifromsand** _absolutely right

_1:05 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

Tweeting from my office but happy birthday Himawari! I'm so proud of my daughter! I love her so much and she's growing up so fast!

_1:06 am_

**Sasuke** _@sasukeuchiha_

 _ **@narutouzumaki**_ Stan Himawari

_1:06 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

 ** _@sasukeuchiha_ **What the fuck does that even mean what is that

_1:06 am_

**Naruto Uzumaki** _@narutouzumaki_

 ** _@narutouzumaki_** Oops! Didn't mean to swear...

_1:06 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@narutouzumaki_** dad stop trying to look good n shit everyone knows you have the biggest potty mouth

_1:06 am_

**Sasuke** _@sasukeuchiha_

 ** _@narutouzumaki_** I don't actually know what it means but Boruto kept using that word during training. He kept telling me to stan Sakura so I just took it out of context

_1:07 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@sasukeuchiha_** im proud of u. ugh, your mind

_1:08 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 ** _@boruhoe_** stop harassing my fucking dad omnksnkjn

_1:10 am_

**god's masterpiece** _@chochoke_

hima birth

_1:11 am_

**best boy** _@inojiny_

 ** _@chochoke_** Stop it with that and say happy birthday like every other sane person,,, also happy birthday Himawari!!! It's really hard to believe that an angel like Hima is related to...

_1:12 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 ** _@inojiny_** say it. u wont. sayit-

_1:12 am_

**best boy** _@inojiny_

 ** _@saradaa_** You know what I mean though, right? Like how are Himawari and Boruto even related-

_1:14 am_

**keeeef** _@keithyboi_

inojin snapped

_1:14 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@inojiny_** we're siblings dumbass

_1:14 am_

**god's masterpiece** _@chochoke_

 ** _@boruhoe_** i think he's implying that your sister is literally the definition of cute and pure while you probably crawled out of hell after satan disowned u

_1:14 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 _ **@chochoke**_ ...

_1:15 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

i'm fucking hurt!!! recently, on "Boruto Needs New Friends"....

_1:16 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 ** _@boruhoe_** don't you think that was unnecessarily dramatic?

_1:17 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@saradaa_** you're not the one cryign at 1 am on your little sister's birthday

_August 1st 9:12 am_

**Hima <3** _@uhimawari_

thank you for all of the birthday wishes! **_@boruhoe @inojiny @shikashikadai @saradaa @chochoke_** and many more!

_9:17 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

WHEN did you get twitter

_9:17 am_

**Hima <3** _@uhimawari_

 ** _@boruhoe_ **this morning? i-

_9:17 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@uhimawari_** okaaaaay,,,, wya

_9:18 am_

**Hima <3** _@uhimawari_

 ** _@boruhoe_** sarada's house

_9:18 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@uhimawari_ **oh no get away from her noW hima

_9:19 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

 ** _@boruhoe_ **first of all, fuck you :P

_9:19 am_

**Hima <3** _@uhimawari_

 ** _@boruhoe_** sarada was just reading your thirst tweets. i dont know how to feel about it boruto

_9:19 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

@uhimawari FFFCUK NO I WASNT ITS JUST ALL OVER MY TWITTER

_9:20 am_

**Hima <3 ** _@uhimawari_

 ** _@boruhoe_ **uH OH SHES SCREENSHOTTING THEM OH OH OH

_9:20 am_

**i'm really boruto** _@boruhoe_

 ** _@saradaa_ **there's a fanfic about me too if you wanna read it ;)

_9:21 am_

**Hima <3** _@uhimawari_

 ** _@boruhoe_ **SHES COMONG AFTRER ME SHS CHASINF ME BORRRYRIT

_August 1st 11:09 am_

**Sarada Uchiha** _@saradaa_

just to clear things up, i was NOT reading boruto thirst tweets and i did NOT screenshot anything and im definitely not reading that goddamn fanfic

_11:19 am_

**want 2 shikaDIE** _@shikashikadai_

yeah and i want to be alive. sarada no one believes you

_11:26 am_

**god's masterpiece** _@chochoke_

maam this is a lie

**Author's Note:**

> @boruhoe - Boruto<  
> @saradaa - Sarada  
> @narutouzumaki - Naruto  
> @sasukeuchiha - Sasuke  
> @shikashikadai - Shikadai  
> @sakurauchiha - Sakura
> 
> (I'll add more as they appear in the story)


End file.
